Author Topic: The things I've found that help.  (Read 11735 times)

girlwithtwohearts

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The things I've found that help.
« on: March 21, 2010, 11:36:56 PM »
Hey I can't believe no-one has posted anything on this section yet?  Surely this is why we all log on to this forum - to get some help by hearing how other people are recovering?

Well - OK - here goes. I've got stress related depression, due to work. Have been off work for 3 months now. I'm going back after Easter, hopefully.

The things I have found that help - CBT is good. It helps you re-frame your negative thoughts into kinder, more positive ones.  There are also some great books to read - I can highly recommend 'How to Stop Worrying and Start Living' by Dale Carnegie. Also 'The Power of Positive Thinking' by Norman Vincent Peale. A good book about CBT is 'Overcoming Depression' by Paul Gilbert

I was hoping for a long while that someone else could help me. But, to be honest, we have to do a lot of the work ourselves. Depression is an illness, and it is horrible. But there are so many different forms of it, and everyone experiences it slightly differently, so it is difficult to get a treatment that fits everyone. We have to do certain things though - to help ourselves. It is confusing, frustrating, painful - but there are little things we can do.

We have to be kind to ourselves. Stop beating ourselves up with our thoughts.
Be good to our bodies - take gentle exercise, eat well.
Try to do something for someone else, it takes our mind off ourselves.

It's hard - believe me I know. But take little steps. Thinking about everything is overwhelming, but just try to live one day at a time.

The worries of yesterday, added to those of tomorrow, make even the strongest falter....

Good luck folks - let's fight the monster.




« Last Edit: March 21, 2010, 11:41:16 PM by girlwithtwohearts »

girlwithtwohearts

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #1 on: March 22, 2010, 05:31:21 PM »

After writing that last night....you'd think I'd be really positive and achieving things today. Nope - I have been so down and unmotivated. I feel so different in the evenings compared to the mornings.

Oh well - one step at a time folks .....

kotinka

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #2 on: April 25, 2011, 01:19:33 PM »
I've found music helps to lift my mood, it has to be cheerful stuff though, sad songs tip me the other way really quickly.  I've taken to playing my own stuff on mp3 set to random.  More controllable than the radio.

PaulaJo

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #3 on: August 10, 2012, 03:14:02 PM »
I have found that talking to others. who have had depression (and anxiety) helps in a big way.
I am going through a depressed stage at the moment - no idea exactly what kind of depression it is; I had mild depression in Uni and I thought I had beaten it but it has returned this year.

Anyway, I have found out that a friend/ acquaintance I have known for 3 years, actually had severe depression a few years ago - and she went through a lot; lots of medication, therapy, CBT.
Just talking to her, knowing that she knew what it is like, and wouldn't judge me (and tell me to pull myself together) was great. My fiance is really supportive and patient, but nothing beats talking to someone who has walked the same road themselves.

PaulaJo

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #4 on: August 10, 2012, 03:22:17 PM »
Just remembered - some books that I have found that help:

Women Who Think Too Much
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Women-Who-Think-Too-Much/dp/0749924810/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1344608041&sr=8-1
I'm half-way through this book. It is mainly aimed at women (because statistically women tend to overthink more than men do) but the content can be used by both men and women.
It helps you break free from over-thinking, which often makes depression and anxiety worse. It's helped me a lot. I got into a mental 'hole' one night when I was trying to sleep, and I managed to use techniques from the book and pull myself out of the hopeless thoughts and managed to regain equilibrium and meditated until I was sleepy.
The techniques really helped me feel like I could be in control at the worst moments.

The other book I have not yet read, but was recommended by a friend who beat/ is beating her severe depression:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Manage-Your-Mind-Mental-Fitness/dp/0198527721/ref=sr_1_sc_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1344421170&sr=1-1-spell

I hope these help you!

Zaf

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #5 on: August 10, 2012, 03:58:36 PM »
Thanks for the links  _)_

Z xx
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Leo

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #6 on: December 08, 2012, 08:32:24 AM »
I run my own dog treat business. I find baking therapeutic. It gives me satisfaction creating something.
I am only me. That is all I can be.
No more, no less, don't second guess.
I love, I live, I laugh, I cry.
I've wished sometimes that I could die.
Some days I'm funny, others I'm not.
Sometimes I'm in overdrive, and I can't stop.
You may not like me, but that's ok, because this is me and how ill stay.

Catbrian

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #7 on: December 14, 2012, 07:42:48 PM »
I've just been baking Choc chip cookies while making chilli for tomorrow.  Once I get started, it is relaxing

mat

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #8 on: December 15, 2012, 09:21:22 AM »
I think cooking in general is relaxing, I know that once I am in a good mood, I get the urge to either cook or bake .     
BEFORE YOU ACT, LISTEN
BEFORE YOU REACT, THINK
BEFORE YOU SPEND, EARN
BEFORE YOU CRITICIZE, WAIT
BEFORE YOU PRAY, FORGIVE

BEFORE YOU QUIT, TRY

Jon

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #9 on: December 16, 2012, 05:35:08 PM »
I agree about cooking. During depressive spells I have to force myself into the kitchen as I normally have little inclination to eat. But cooking itself is so satisfying and a good meal at the end of it always raises the spirits, at least a little.
The worst thing to do during a depressive spell, for me, is to sit and do nothing, allowing my mind to turn further and further in on itself, finding new ways to torment itself. I had that feeling creeping over me earlier today and all I wanted to do was hide under the duvet. But I decided instead to join a friend on a walk over the hills with our dogs. The walk itself was very enjoyable. Returning home, the depression started nagging away at me again but at least I know I've done something positive with my afternoon and that knowledge in itself lifts me up a little bit. Even that little bit makes a huge difference to me.

iggyelvis

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #10 on: December 19, 2012, 12:23:53 AM »
joining an art class helps

Sleepyjay

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #11 on: December 19, 2012, 11:20:17 AM »
Bit of a cliche but just trying to stay in the present. Taking lots of walks and watching my Cat model calmness and relaxation.

Jon

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #12 on: December 19, 2012, 11:27:10 AM »
During spells of depression, I've always found it next to impossible to live in the present, my painful thoughts and feelings rushing to the past and to the future. However, I've noticed a significant difference since buying a book on mindfulness and starting to do some of meditation techniques. I would highly recommend Mindfulness: A practical guide to peace in a frantic world by Mark Williams and Danny Penman. Make sure you get the edition with the audio CD. Hope it works for you.

Sleepyjay

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #13 on: December 19, 2012, 10:56:29 PM »
Thanks for the book recommendation Jon. I find it difficult also and feel like I need to pinch myself when I'm drifitng back into bad habits and old thinking patterns. I know it takes alot of practice but I like the idea of being more mindfull and learning to pace myself. Recently I've realised I have been reckless with my thoughts and actions for a long time and need to slowly change this.

Jon

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Re: The things I've found that help.
« Reply #14 on: December 19, 2012, 11:13:23 PM »
Likewise, Sleepjay.
I risked having a few drinks tonight and the demons returned.
Tomorrow, I'll begin again. I'm realising that alcohol cannot play a part if one is serious about living in the moment.
I wish you all good things, Jon